Love from Loss

Imagine, just for a moment, that you are on the cusp of a major life transition. One that might radically change the way you are perceived by the world. It could be a career change, a new relationship, a move. Any number of life changes, big and small, can have a significant, yet unforeseen, impact on those around you.

Now, shift your own perspective to that of someone in your circle that will be impacted by your change and imagine that their reaction to this event is so extreme as to perceive it as your death; from their point of view, your life change is so radical that they feel as though you have died. As a result, you can become embroiled in their experience of the grieving process; i.e. the Kübler-Ross “5 Stages of Loss and Grief” – denial & isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.

Despite the negative connotation so often associated with this process it is, nevertheless, an opportunity for love and growth; both for you, and for them. It is an opportunity for everyone to explore and learn from the perspective of another; to shift your frame-of-reference and view the experience through a different lens. Sometimes the relationship can survive this transition, albeit in a radically new light; sometime, the relationship itself will need to be mourned. Either way, there is much to be learned by everyone involved.

This blog post was written by Michelle Emson. Catch Michelle at momondays Toronto on 06/23/2014! Get your advance tickets here: Buy Tickets

20140309-SanctuaryStudios-9180_Print Michelle is a keynote speaker, educator, and advocate working to ‘End The Stigma’ of gender dysphoria and mental illness. Physically declared male at birth, she transitioned to her authentic female self in 2011 following a 45-year identity struggle, surviving the depths of a deep depression, and an intensive three years of soul searching, development, and personal loss. For more about Michelle, visit

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